Too often we are wrapped up in trying to be the best. We push ourselves to be good at school, to be good at socializing, to be good at eating and exercising. But no matter how hard we try to be it all, there are only 24 hours in the day.
Some people take an “all or nothing” approach, feeling if they can’t eat right or exercise every day then why bother? But believe it or not that pressure to be perfect can actually do more harm than good.
When we learn to be flexible with ourselves and leave time for rest and relaxation it can help relieve the guilty feelings of not doing enough, which, paradoxically, can have the effect of helping us stick to our goals even more. Below are some tips and tricks for how to practice more kindness with yourself and how to incorporate more stress-free moments in your day.
5 Morning Minutes
How we start our day sets the tone for how it will unfold. If you find yourself rushing out the door and constantly feeling late or unprepared this little trick can help. By setting aside at least 5 minutes each morning to sit quietly, focus on breathing, do a little yoga, read a newspaper or simply scroll through Facebook, having a mild morning is worth its weight in gold!
Celebrate the Small Victories
Too often we are all too quick to notice what we fail to do rather than patting ourselves on the back for a job well done. Don’t be afraid to be your own cheerleader. When you cook a new meal, get 8 consecutive hours of sleep, finish assignments, or successfully pay your bills on time don’t forget to bask in the glory of your awesomeness.
Challenge the “Voices” in Your Head
This one is tough. Many of us don’t notice this sneaky self-sabotage but we often think very unkind thoughts about ourselves. One way to remedy this problem is to simply become aware when we “say” something to ourselves that is unkind and replace it with a neutral or positive thought. Example: “I’m such a failure, I missed my last two workouts” can be replaced with “wow I’m really busy lately, no wonder I couldn’t make it to the gym!”
When we remove the guilt of not going it opens us up to finding creative solutions (maybe a different schedule is needed, or a new activity that is more enjoyable). An easy rule to follow, if you wouldn’t say it to someone else, don’t say it to yourself.
Leave Yourself Love Notes
This may sound silly but it really works. Putting inspirational quotes or positive affirmations on post-its around the house can help remind you of your strengths. A quick google search comes up with loads of examples which include: “the strongest people aren’t always the people who win, but the people who don’t give up when they lose” or “happiness cannot come from without, it must come from within” (https://twitter.com/inspire_us). There’s also an app for that if you want a daily reminder to keep on the sunny side.
Read Something Fun (for a change!)
Leisure reading often goes by the wayside when so much of our time is devoted to required reading. It’s often nice to carve out a little space for reading something not required, even if it’s only five or ten minutes before bed at night or once a week with your Saturday morning coffee.
Stop and Smell the Roses
If your life is anything like mine, you spend a lot of time either in a lecture hall or in front of a computer. There are days I barely see the sun. I notice I feel much better, however, when I consciously make the effort to take a nature break (or several) during the day. It can be as small as giving yourself a ten-minute break to walk around campus between classes or as large as a full-fledged hike into the wilderness. Notice how the sunlight feels on your skin, the sounds of the wind in the trees and the birds and the bees. People weren’t designed to be indoors all day.
The most important thing is to learn what works for you. Be flexible; understand that somedays will be easier than others and allow yourself to be open to change. When all else fails take a deep breath and phone a friend. I promise the time you take to care for yourself will make the rest of your sometimes crazy life more manageable.
Katie Williams is a FitU nutrition and exercise mentor and also a graduate student in nutrition and plans to become a dietitian. Katie has an undergraduate degree in Psychology and is interested in teaching, nutrition counseling, and clinical nutrition. Katie has two children and enjoys being outdoors, yoga, boxing, and jogging. She commutes from Lincoln everyday for work and school.
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